It’s that time again, bloggers… time to unite…

JOIN HERE

 

Out of sheer curiosity, I posted a survey on my PNN front page asking, “If you found out that your courteous, quiet neighbors were actually drug dealers would you turn them in?” The results surprised me. You may view them here.


About 44% said “Yes,” another 44% said “No,” and 11% were not sure. I am not sure what that says for the survey takers, anyone have any comments on the matter?

Yesterday, my daughter and I took my two grandchildren to get their Easter pictures made. Lexi, the big sister at 18 months, was all over the place, as usual, having to see what everyone else was doing, searching for a space to squeeze in on all the fun.

Of course, if she took the time to pose for her own pictures, she might miss giving her two cents worth to another family on their choice of picture poses or backdrops. 

Mommy and Mimi just would not stop with the “Lexi, hold Kyler’s hand, give the bunny a kiss, can  you sit on the stool, no don’t take off your shoes, come back here, no, don’t bother those people!”

Needless to say, the photographer was very professional and very good with kids like my granddaughter – The Brats. After eighty-nine pictures, my daughter chose the ones she liked while I chased and bribed and begged Lexi to leave everyone else in the portrait studio with at least one nerve in tact.

But I’m not kidding anyone. I loved it. I laughed and enjoyed her antics to the point that she will probably be hell on wheels when she gets a bit older. Couldn’t help it :) Here’s a few of the pics :)













  

I am not so pompous that I would call myself “Jack of All Trades, Master of None,” but I do know a few good things about a few good things. And now add one more: Fire Ant Slayer.

I was cleaning up my back yard and spotted a wayward piece of sheet metal lying on the ground that had been previously left on a single-axle car dolly I sold to a friend last week. Granted, I usually flip large objects over before lifting or moving them in the yard, as I have had my share of running from Black Widow spiders and various kinds of snakes (except Rattlers – they usually smell like a goat, I was taught as a young southern hunter in dark woods, Alabama – HIIEE-YAH!- take that)!

But today, I suppose I wanted to live on the wild side - the bumpy, blistered, red-rising, insect-bite-my-ass side – because I just haven’t had a good ol’ BUG BITE since I was, I don’t know, twelve or thirteen?

Before I knew what the heck I was doing, the wayward piece of sheet metal was in the air above my head, on its way to the high side of my deck, and- WHAT THA- I felt little specks of something falling all over me. Ever had that burst of raw panic that engulfs you when you realize that the most idiotic choice you could muster has landed you right slap dab in the middle of a hoard of insects or monstrous enemies of some sort? I dropped the wayward piece of sheet metal somewhere in the yard and took off running for my back door, flailing my arms around and chanting “Oh God, help me!” over and over. I was wearing a light colored t-shirt before the fire ants fell from the sheet metal to my my head upper torso, and after, the t-shirt was blackened with many biting ants!

I happened to make it inside before coming out of my clothes. The scene was probably comical, looking like Ace Ventura when he thought he had bats in his hair – of course, I did have tiny monsters in my hair. After jumping in the shower and looking myself over in the mirror about twenty times, the war was on!

I dug fire ant killer and every insecticide and garden bug killer, even flying bug/wasp spray from the garage and manned myself with a high-powered sprayer hose, a cigarette lighter, and a gallon or so of gasoline and approached the anthills in my back yard. Neighbors have now dubbed me “Buffy the Fire Ant Slayer,” and with good reason. Not a hill was left standing. Most of my grass is burnt away, too.

I have learned a great lesson from this, however. One is that those anthills can be very deep in the ground and it may not be a good idea to load them with gas and set them ablaze. The other lesson? Praying “Oh God, help me,” while running and flailing your arms can do great good: I only ended up with five bites from the little devils :)

This past weekend I helped a good friend put on an estate sale because her elderly father is moving into an assisted living apartment. We priced, hung, displayed, organized, inventoried, boxed, bagged, and separated so many things that meant so much to her and her family. Once Saturday morning arrived, we opened her father’s house to the public.

Signs had been posted, classified ads in the local paper had been placed two weeks prior, and it seemed all roads led to Rome as the community descended on the “Mother of an Estate Sale,” as we had so named it. But something was bugging me. Something had been overlooked.

As the entourage filled the house and began to pilfer the items my friend’s father allowed us to sell for him, that overlooked thing that had been bugging me came clear and I turned to whisper to my friend, “We are going to be robbed blind, Girl!” She winced and scanned our immediate area to make sure no one heard my comment, then returned my obviously ridiculous statement with, “Jeanne! These people won’t steal from us! Goodness sake, we live in the Bible Belt!”

I told her these dear people will leave their Bibles at home and hide her stuff under their belts! And I set out to prove it to her as well as to satiate that bugging thing deep in my belly.

There are a few things I will never be completely free of since I am a *REFORMED* felon, but “Class A” felon, nonetheless: one is that I do not trust another living sole outside my husband and daughters. The second is that I love video surveillance, but no longer use it to have a jump on the cops approaching my home. The third is that I do not trust another living sole, well, you get the idea.

I jumped in my Jeep and flew to my house to gather the essentials for creating a back-room security den that would have made Wal-Mart security heads give a Tim Allen, “Oh-oh-oh!” About an hour later I had two monitors and a converted 13” black and white television showing me the most hidden parts of my friends’ home. Not more than fifteen minutes into the “patrol,” a middle-aged female entered a back bathroom and quickly stuffed two antique candle holders into her baggy purse. I had my daughter locate and bring my friend to the “security room.”

She was livid. She asked me if I had relapsed! She actually wondered if I were high! I answered, “Just watch, Kim! Just watch!” A few moments later, same middle aged female, same bathroom, and this time she was struggling to hide a small McCoy flower pot anywhere she could. Kim gasped and screamed, “Stop her, Jeanne!”

I was having a ball up until that point. I had forgotten security detail may include confrontation and I suck at confrontations. I detest a confrontation. But I mustered all the “Do the Right Thing” stuff I had in me and went to confront the lady.

She was heading to the little desk we had set up as a pay counter, of sorts, and I saw my chance. I duck-dodged-scampered to the chair beside the desk that Kim’s seven-year old Gracie occupied and scooped her into my lap as I took a seat and the Bible Belt Shoplifter approached. Fortunately, Gracie believes my crazy antics to be genuine fun and did not object. As the lady paid for a pair of Etienne Aigner boots that Kim’s late mother had worn maybe twice, I reached for a bag and declared, “I appreciate you saving us the trouble of bagging the other items, but I really need to see the price tag on them as my memory doesn’t serve me well in remembering the total – we sure priced a lot of things yesterday!”

I paused and waited, my finger motionless a few inches above the calculator keys. She was noticeably flustered, and to my complete delight over not having to endure a confrontation, the lady removed the two candle holders and a tiny McCoy flower pot from her oversized purse. I believe she mentioned something about being accustomed to carrying a shopping bag and had just plain forgotten about the items, but I was wallowing in a bit of “I was right, I was right, neener-neener-neener,” and cannot recall her exact words.

The rest of the weekend, Kim manned the security monitors and me and Gracie collected the dough. Yeah, a few things made me think about this past weekend. I cannot believe someone would steal from a precious, elderly man who allowed his eldest daughter to put a price tag on his memories because it made her happy to “do her part” in his transition from independence to assisted living. But I knew it would happen. Looking back, I wish I had been wrong. I still would have sang the little jingle to Gracie, though slightly different: “I was wrong, I was wrong, neener-neener-neener.”

We have two grandchildren and another on the way. I read this article because my first Grandchild, Lexi, the Apple of My Eye, would probably be deemed demonic by the Catholic Church when she doesn’t get her way. Anyhoo, I thought I’d share this :)

http://kidshealth.org/teen/drug_alcohol/drugs/know_about_drugs.html
Reviewed by: Jennifer Shroff Pendley, PhD

Ages 0 to 2
Babies and toddlers are naturally curious. So it's wise to eliminate temptations and no-nos — items such as TVs and video equipment, stereos, jewelry, and especially cleaning supplies and medications should be kept well out of reach.

When your crawling baby or roving toddler heads toward an unacceptable or dangerous play object, calmly say "No" and either remove your child from the area or distract him or her with an appropriate activity.

Timeouts can be effective discipline for toddlers. A child who has been hitting, biting, or throwing food, for example, should be told why the behavior is unacceptable and taken to a designated timeout area — a kitchen chair or bottom stair — for a minute or two to calm down (longer timeouts are not effective for toddlers).

It's important to not spank, hit, or slap a child of any age. Babies and toddlers are especially unlikely to be able to make any connection between their behavior and physical punishment. They will only feel the pain of the hit.

And don't forget that kids learn by watching adults, particularly their parents. Make sure your behavior is role-model material. You'll make a much stronger impression by putting your own belongings away rather than just issuing orders to your child to pick up toys while your stuff is left strewn around.

Ages 3 to 5
As your child grows and begins to understand the connection between actions and consequences, make sure you start communicating the rules of your family's home.
Explain to kids what you expect of them before you punish them for a certain behavior.

For instance, the first time your 3-year-old uses crayons to decorate the living room wall, discuss why that's not allowed and what will happen if your child does it again (for instance, your child will have to help clean the wall and will not be able to use the crayons for the rest of the day). If the wall gets decorated again a few days later, issue a reminder that crayons are for paper only and then enforce the consequences.

The earlier that parents establish this kind of "I set the rules and you're expected to listen or accept the consequences" standard, the better for everyone. Although it's sometimes easier for parents to ignore occasional bad behavior or not follow through on some threatened punishment, this sets a bad precedent. Consistency is the key to effective discipline, and it's important for parents to decide (together, if you are not a single parent) what the rules are and then uphold them.

While you become clear on what behaviors will be punished, don't forget to reward good behaviors. Don't underestimate the positive effect that your praise can have — discipline is not just about punishment but also about recognizing good behavior. For example, saying "I'm proud of you for sharing your toys at playgroup" is usually more effective than punishing a child for the opposite behavior — not sharing. And be specific when doling out praise; don't just say, "Good job!"

If your child continues an unacceptable behavior no matter what you do, try making a chart with a box for each day of the week. Decide how many times your child can misbehave before a punishment kicks in or how long the proper behavior must be displayed before it is rewarded. Post the chart on the refrigerator and then track the good and unacceptable behaviors every day. This will give your child (and you) a concrete look at how it's going. Once this begins to work, praise your child for learning to control misbehavior and, especially, for overcoming any stubborn problem.

Timeouts also can work well for kids at this age. Establish a suitable timeout place that's free of distractions and will force your child to think about how he or she has behaved. Remember, getting sent to your room doesn't have an impact if a computer, TV, and video games are there. Don't forget to consider the length of time that will best suit your child. Experts say 1 minute for each year of age is a good rule of thumb; others recommend using the timeout until the child is calmed down (to teach self-regulation).

It's important to tell kids what the right thing to do is, not just to say what the wrong thing is. For example, instead of saying "Don't jump on the couch," try "Please sit on the furniture and put your feet on the floor."

Ages 6 to 8
Timeouts and consequences are also effective discipline strategies for this age group.

Again, consistency is crucial, as is follow-through. Make good on any promises of discipline or else you risk undermining your authority. Kids have to believe that you mean what you say. This is not to say you can't give second chances or allow a certain margin of error, but for the most part, you should act on what you say.
Be careful not to make unrealistic threats of punishment ("Slam that door and you'll never watch TV again!") in anger, since not following through could weaken all your threats. If you threaten to turn the car around and go home if the squabbling in the backseat doesn't stop, make sure you do exactly that. The credibility you'll gain with your kids is much more valuable than a lost beach day.

Huge punishments may take away your power as a parent. If you ground your son or daughter for a month, your child may not feel motivated to change behaviors because everything has already been taken away.

Ages 9 to 12
Kids in this age group — just as with all ages — can be disciplined with natural consequences. As they mature and request more independence and responsibility, teaching them to deal with the consequences of their behavior is an effective and appropriate method of discipline.

For example, if your fifth grader's homework isn't done before bedtime, should you make him or her stay up to do it or even lend a hand yourself? Probably not — you'll miss an opportunity to teach a key life lesson. If homework is incomplete, your child will go to school the next day without it and suffer the resulting bad grade.

It's natural for parents to want to rescue kids from mistakes, but in the long run they do kids a favor by letting them fail sometimes. Kids see what behaving improperly can mean and probably won't make those mistakes again. However, if your child does not seem to be learning from natural consequences, set up some of your own to help modify the behavior.

Ages 13 and Up
By now you've laid the groundwork. Your child knows what's expected and that you mean what you say about the penalties for bad behavior. Don't let down your guard now — discipline is just as important for teens as it is for younger kids. Just as with the 4-year-old who needs you to set a bedtime and enforce it, your teen needs boundaries, too.

Set up rules regarding homework, visits by friends, curfews, and dating and discuss them beforehand with your teenager so there will be no misunderstandings. Your teen will probably complain from time to time, but also will realize that you're in control. Believe it or not, teens still want and need you to set limits and enforce order in their lives, even as you grant them greater freedom and responsibility.

When your teen does break a rule, taking away privileges may seem the best plan of action. While it's fine to take away the car for a week, for example, be sure to also discuss why coming home an hour past curfew is unacceptable and worrisome.
Remember to give a teenager some control over things. Not only will this limit the number of power struggles you have, it will help your teen respect the decisions that you do need to make.

You could allow a younger teen to make decisions concerning school clothes, hair styles, or even the condition of his or her room. As your teen gets older, that realm of control might be extended to include an occasional relaxed curfew.

It's also important to focus on the positives. For example, have your teen earn a later curfew by demonstrating positive behavior instead of setting an earlier curfew as punishment for irresponsible behavior.

A Word About Spanking
Perhaps no form of discipline is more controversial than spanking. Here are some reasons why the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) discourages spanking:

Spanking teaches kids that it's OK to hit when they're angry.
Spanking can physically harm children.
Rather than teaching kids how to change their behavior, spanking makes them fearful of their parents and merely teaches them to avoid getting caught.
For kids seeking attention by acting out, spanking may inadvertently "reward" them (negative attention is better than no attention at all).

Have a great weekend, all!!

Quote

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

Questions Relative to One of Life’s Biggest Choices
by Jeanne and Coy Carreker

If you are asking yourself this question, chances are, you should get into some kind of recovery program for whatever addiction you and your family are suffering with. The first time I asked myself this question was many, many years ago, way before the courts ordered me into a drug recovery program. Had I decided to go into rehab when I first realized I should get help, many problems would have been averted.

The problem we Americans seem to have when deciding if we should go into rehab is one of both procrastination and pride. We do not think anyone can do better for us than we can do for ourselves. I believed I could make it work out on my own. I would eventually get back on track. And anyway, I had seen movies and talk shows that depicted rehab as groups of people standing in a circle, holding hands, and chanting something along the lines of “It works if you work it.” Seemed ridiculous to me. But, if it worked for others, I’d give it a try . . . next Monday.

Signs That It Is Time
Make no bones about it, if you cannot face the day without your substance of preference in hand, you need to seek help. If the thought of going without your drug of choice makes you spend a good bit of time or money in order to prevent being without it, you should seriously consider rehab. If you have been charged with a crime due to your habit, if you have lost employment, loved ones, or sold belongings in order to obtain more drugs, it is time for help. If you have sold drugs in order to have drugs available to you, you should look into the possibility of going into rehab.

What to Seek In a Rehab
The rehab treatment center which seems most beneficial to its patients normally offers a variety of treatment programs in order to meet its patient’s individual needs. Program options should include inpatient, outpatient, residential, and/or short-stay options. These programs differ in the fact that some are managed in a hospital/medical setting, and some are not as arduous in standard.

When choosing the best rehab for you, the thing to consider is this: your drug dependency and/or alcoholism was not created overnight. Thus, there is no quick-fix. Einstein said, “The significant problems we have cannot be solved at the same level of thinking with which we created them.” It takes time to un-do all you have done. Behavior and modes of thinking change with our goals and desires. When you seek out pills as a first priority of every day for a length of time, your way of thinking and behavioral habits change. Your very happiness depends upon obtaining whatever drug your system has become accustomed to having to feel normal. It takes time to adjust and develop new ways of existing throughout the day. There is no quick fix.

Another thing to consider when seeking the rehab for you is the cost involved. We would all love to be able to enter the same glamorous rehabs that the stars do, and think of rehab more like we would think of a vacation getaway. In truth, most addicts in need of rehab have depleted most of their monetary assets, and simply cannot afford high-cost rehabs. Most do not have health insurance. There are affordable rehabilitative services out there, however. A good option to consider here would be to find out what programs work within the court systems in your area. These programs are always happy to see a voluntary admission to their programs. Or, you could always wait until it is an involuntary placement by the courts.

Also, when deciding what rehab will work for you, consider the level of family involvement within their care regiment. Addiction affects those around you almost, if not more so, than it does you. Very often, addicts do not realize the deep emotional impact that their addictions have had on their loved ones. Group therapy and family-oriented lectures or settings can offer healing, or at least a road-map to that healing for you and yours to continue.

In some cases, addicts have tried to hide their addictions from their families, so the above statements about family involvement in rehab may have caused the hair to rise on some readers. The truth is, you cannot hide that there is a problem once it reaches the addiction stage. Your loved ones know there is something wrong, and sometimes the worst worry a loved one can go through is trying to figure out what the problem really is, without hurting or offending you. But they know there’s a problem, have no doubt about that. Allowing them to know you are addressing the problem with the decision to enter rehab will most likely produce a happiness and desire to help in your loved ones. Don’t underestimate them. There’s a reason you call them “Loved Ones.”

Finally, consider the after-care offered when deciding to enter a rehab. As stated previously, alcohol and drug addiction took time to progress in your life and create the traits and hopelessness that you battle with on a daily basis. Recovery takes time. The new skills you learn in rehab must be integrated into your life in order to free you of your burden. Recovery from drugs and alcohol is a life-long battle, though it does get so much easier. Eventually you will reach the stage in recovery where you deem drugs or alcohol as not being an option for you any longer, but it takes your work and commitment to get to this stage.

Where to Start
If you have reached the end of this article, it appears you have already started on your road to recovery. You are past considering if you should go into rehab or not. The next step is to follow the address provided or contact a recovery center near you. A natural joy can be experienced again without your drug of choice at hand.

Contact the author:
h2oforthegaslit@hotmail.com

In the very least, your face muscles still work. That’s a reason.

Some days it may feel as if that is the only reason to smile, but after the smile is performed, it’s worth it.

Ever realize that learning to smile in unhappy situations or during hard times does seem to make everything easier to bear for the moment?

I learned to smile while in County on Maximum. The smile even helped ease panic attacks, a common thing for folks to go through in jail.

So smile often, no matter the circumstance, and especially the circumstance :)

When things become easier to bear, they become easier to change.

And being able to create change in given circumstances always leads to us being….

…good to each other :)